Diana Krall is an amazing singer, you should check out her stuff. I saw her once at the Jazz Fests they used to have at FLCC. So, this is all in good fun.

TSG has a copy of her stage rider for concerts. For those of you not familiar, a stage rider is basically a list of everything the artist expects to have provided for them at the gig by either the promoter or the event organizers (and as you can imagine, it’s an interesting fight between those two entities that determines who pays for what!). TSG just loves stage riders because they tend to show off revealing and sometimes embarrassing facts about artists.

But in fairness, if you’re on the road every day of your life, running yourself ragged so promoters and organizers get to make more money off you than you’ll ever see, I think it’s perfectly fair to expect a bit of pampering. Or just play the rock star like Van Halen back in the days and demand M&M’s in the dressing room, separated by color. It don’t mean a thang if you ain’t got style, baby.

So, TSG is a bit flushed with the fact that Diana Krall actually expects a specific wine list in the dressing room. Well, I would use the touring opportunity to taste local wines rather than specify stuff I’ve already had, but that’s me. What I find amusing is how white-trashy her selection of wines actually is. I mean, they’re all Cali and Oregon wines with a few French wines thrown in there to throw off the curve. She’s demanding cellars like Rosemount and Ravenswood, and all Merlot, Cabs, Pinots. I like Merlot, too, but Jesus woman! Stretch out a little!

And “Swanson Merlot?” Don’t they make frozen peas?

Ugh! And Chardonay! I use that to wipe down the sink in the bathroom.

So, if Diana Krall ever comes back around, someone please send her to Sonora Wine Bar and help her branch out a little!